I just want to eat my pasta¹, ignore Jeopardy!², and veg out. But first, I want to point you to an exciting development.

Necessary disclaimer first — from the very beginnings of Fleen, my hosting has been provided by Jon Rosenberg, as readers of this page are reminded every once in a while; I just don’t want there to be anybody thinking I’m hiding that relationship. I hold that when I talk about what Jon’s doing, it’s because it’s genuinely interesting to me, but you can judge for yourself if I’m speaking from a biased position.

Okay, so Scenes From A Multiverse has had some recurring characters, but not what you’d consider a storyline, except for the deconstructed pseudo-fantasy that is Dungeon Divers. There’s a lot of story there, and a lot of character, and you can see Rosenberg’s approach to the story change with changes in his life, particularly as his children have been growing up.

It also hasn’t updated very much since … forever. The Trump Interregnum pushed Rosenberg to the political end of the cartooning spectrum — some of his best work ever, bee-tee-dubs — but you could tell his heart was with the Divers.

He had plans to get back, and then a pandemic hit, and one thing and another³, culminating in his family getting hit by the ‘rona — fortunately, to no great detriment, but not fun times.

Having stared down the Plague and found it wanting, Rosenberg’s thrown himself into writing, and the first new update of Dungeon Divers in about forever is now up at his Patreon. The plan is to concentrate on doing the story as one big thing instead of a handful of updates interspersed with other comics. It’ll be a book, but Patreons can read the new installments as they go in, which I expect will be at a pretty brisk pace.

Me? I’ll be waiting for the book, because I’m not a user of Patreon. I point readers to a lot of them — despite my cynicism about the plans that the venture capital funding the site has for the long term — but I don’t plunk any money in. I’ve mentioned this in the past, but I don’t think I’ve ever spelled it out explicitly.

I see a difference between getting sent review copies of books (got one in the mail today, in fact), or reviewing books (or other forms of story, as required) that I have bought for myself. But I think I run the risk of losing the necessary critical distance — or even just the perception of it — when I move from purchasing a finished product to supporting the initial creation of that product. It’s just the line I’ve drawn in the sand, so you’ll have to get other people to tell you how good the new Dungeon Divers updates are — I’m guessing very — and I’ll be sure to tell you what I think when the collection comes out.

Spam of the day:

CAREDOGBEST™ — Personalized Dog Harness. All sizes from XS to XXL. Easy ON/OFF in just 2 seconds. LIFETIME WARRANTY.

My dog’s hobby is keeping the couch from floating away with her unconscious body weight. I think we’re good.

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¹ Radiatore, which are verifiably the best pasta shape. They look like little radiators, and they catch up lots of sauce in their vanes. Just the best.

² We’re on day 8 of 10 of Doctor Fucking Oz as guest host and just … okay, look, I’ve never been on Jeopardy! although I’ve been playing from the couch since ’85 or so. I am very much in agreement with the 600+ past contestants who signed an open letter that asked — paraphrasing slightly here — Have you fuckers lost your mind, inviting that truthless charlatan to host?

³ And the G train?

One good, one bad today.

• Let’s start with the good news! Jeff Smith has been a webcomicker since before there were webcomics; when BONE started, indie self-publishing basically was webcomics, ging direct from creator to audience, without editorial or corporate intermediation. For a while in the past decade, he was a webcomicker literally, with a little project called Tüki: Save The Humans, which updated a couple times a week at his website, and was collected into a couple of floppy comic reprints. It won an award along the way that I was of two minds about, but then again — so was Smith.

  But Smith’s been prone to repetitive-stress injuries, and he was instrumental in the establishment and execution of CXC, which is more than a half-decade of work now, and Tüki’s planned hiatuses stretched longer and longer. He’s just a draw-an-issue kind of guy, not draw-three-pages-a-week.

  Or at least he was — from an announcement today:

  And now this year, the 30th anniversary of BONE #1, I’m going to announce my newest self-published project: Tüki: Fight For Fire [transcribed from video]

  No more webcomickin’, no more single-issue-at-a-timin’, Smith’s done Tüki as a full-length graphic novel that is all ready to go for a July release (which would have been a nice SDCC debut, had there been an SDCC), the actual 30th anniversary month. But because he and publisher/wife/general boss of a person Vijaya Iyer absorbed lessons about the webcomics model and Kickstarter and all of it nearly a decade ago, Smith’s doing something new: T:FFF will be Kickstarted. The campaign goes up on 4 May (mark your calendars), and I imagine we’ll get more details on the book between now and then.

• A’course, in a good news/bad news situation, there’s always got to be bad news, and hooooboy is this one bad:
  

  COVID-19 vaccine site in Northern California closing for two days to host anime event

  What.

  One Facebook commenter suggested SacAnime labeled its event a “swap meet” rather than the more typical “convention” to circumvent the state’s COVID-19 restrictions. Under the state health department’s reopening framework, convention center events are supposed to remain closed in all counties — but swap meets can proceed at up to 50% of normal capacity in counties classified in the red tier of COVID-19 activity, as Placer is.

  WHAT.

  You know what? Let’s take the most generous possible interpretation and pretend this isn’t causing a disruption to vaccinations. It’s a hell of a stretch, but let’s pretend. Why in the everloving godsdamned fuck are you holding a mass-attendance event at a time when we’re on the verge of a third — hell, maybe fourth — wave of COVID and we’re in a godsdamned race between vaccination and variants? Why are you holding a for-damn-sure superspreader event?

  I saw on Twitter a comment that anybody that wants to go to a con this year should be allowed to, but in doing so they give up the right to attend any for the next year, so that those of us who have prioritized the public good over but I wanna don’t have to put up with them once it’s safe to be in groups again. I think that’s wrong.

  I think it should be three years.

  When this pandemic is over, if you were somebody that just had to have your animes at the expense of everybody else’s safety — or you protested masks because freedom, or you required indoor dining — do yourself a favor and never admit that around me. I’ve had way too many patients that were way too harmed over the past year, it’s your fucking fault, and I will lay upside your head with a Halligan bar and not feel even a little bad about it.

Spam of the day:

Dos and dont’s for a healthy liver

Even more than the fact you’re about to try to steal from me based on bullshit fake science, I’m am offended by your apostrophe use. What the hell are you even trying to do? Fix that shit, will ya?

We at Fleen mentioned a short while back that Comic Con International had declare SDCC 2021 to be virtual, and that a shortened version of the con would happen in November.

Over the weekend they posted this:
San Diego — San Diego Comic Convention today announced dates for their November convention. Comic-Con Special Edition will be held as a three-day event over Thanksgiving weekend, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, November 26-28, 2021 at the San Diego Convention Center. It is our hope that by Fall conditions will permit larger public gatherings.

That from the front page of CCI, which does not feature permalinks to their announcements, so it may be gone at whatever time you go to the page. Regardless of the ephemeral nature of the announcement (and more on that in a moment), you have to be wondering exactly how high whoever thought this was a good idea was at the time. Thanksgiving is the quintessential American holiday, everybody that was responsible didn’t gather with their family last November and is not going to skip a second year, and it is the busiest travel weekend of the year.

I had been waiting for the dates to weigh if maybe it was worth going out to cover the return of SDCC, but this? No. Even in a truncated, weekend-only format, the stunning lack of recognition that it will be difficult and expensive to travel or obtain lodging, and that every exhibitor will not only have to forgo their own Thanksgiving, but to handle the cross-country logistics in one of the busiest weeks of the year?

CCI seems to have heard the blowback, as their front page presently has the announcement pushed down by a more recent posting, justifying their decision:

When reviewing dates for an in-person event, it was clear that available meeting and exhibit space would limit our options. Of the dates presented with the fewest restrictions, Friday through Sunday of Thanksgiving weekend seemed to be the best balance of available space and our envisioned event. As longtime fans ourselves, we have attended many conventions over that holiday weekend, opting to spend Thanksgiving day with family and the rest of the weekend with friends and our families of choice. [emphasis mine]

You know what? Good for you. But that presumes you can see family and then travel locally enough to attend a con that weekend. But this would require vendors to show up on Thursday (or Wednesday, or earlier given the competition for travel) to be ready to go on Friday. A local show is not the same as one that — despite protestations to the contrary — will be expected to provide a national- (or even international) scope show, in term of attendees and exhibitors/guests.

While this is not unusual in the convention trade, we understand this choice is not optimal for everyone.

Damn right it’s not optimal. And I can’t think of a single creator that, in the words of Wonderella, would choose you over grandma’s sweet potatoes. This ain’t it, CCI. You absolutely did the right thing canceling in-person SDCC for July. Expecting anybody to show up to exhibit at what you’re now describing as never intended to be the large gathering reflective of the summer event — with monumentally higher travel costs and time commitments, and presumably far fewer fans to make back their costs from — is simply folly.

Time to admit it was a stupid idea and cut it loose before too many people try to make travel arrangements that they’ll have to cancel later. The only way this makes sense is if you pitch it as Hey, San Diego people who’ve never seen the inside of Con before! This one is for you! and turn it into a community-first event.

Spam of the day:

Free jewish singles

Is that free as in these Jewish singles come gratis, or free as in they need to be freed from confinement? If it’s the latter, are the non-singles doomed to imprisonment forever?

I mean, I kept checking Horror Every Day for like six months after its explicit one year runtime elapsed.

Didn’t get to posting yesterday, after a couple of days of really reduced faith in humanity. I also was pretty careful about getting separating the spam from actual comments in the pending queue, but please drop me a note if you tried to chime in and don’t see your words.

And this is as good a time as any to note that there may be a future irregular posting schedule until the whole hosting thing gets sorted. Once Jon and I find a better vendor and the switch is in the works, I’ll let you know.

That’s all I got for you right now. If you’ve got a favorite creator, drop them a line, buy something (not an NFT, dammit) from them, tell somebody who would also like their work. I’ve done my best over the past decade and half to take a stance of promoting and uplifting work that I liked rather than chewing on what I didn’t, and I’d like to encourage all of you to do likewise.

Deep breaths. We’ll find a better place together, one with plenty of makeouts and animals in hats.

EMERGENCY ADDENDUM
As I was finishing the Spam of the day entry, I heard the intro to the noontime call-in show on my local NPR station and it turns out that Erika Moen and Matthew Nolan will be talking about Let’s Talk About It in the next little bit (it is presently 12:14pm EDT on 26 March 2021). You can listen to the stream here, and the replay will eventually be here.

Spam of the day:

Buy Scannable Fake ID – Premium Fake IDs Buy our premium fake IDs with the best security elements. All of our fake ID comes with Scannable features & guaranteed to pass under UV.

This reminds me of the dude two colleges over who was convinced he could have a side business in fake IDs. He painted a wall in his dorm room to resemble an Indiana driver’s license; the customer stood in front, he took a picture, shrunk it down, and laminated it. It looked like shit and wouldn’t fool anybody checking IDs unless they were coked out of their gourd on fine Bolivian flake. I am 1000% certain, however, that they were more plausible than whatever you’re trying to pass off here.

Are we, collectively, godsdamned capable of that? In the past 48 hours, I’ve watched two creators whose work I enjoy to bits take public steps back to deal with reactions to their work, and the necessity of those actions doesn’t speak well of us as a species.

Minna Sundberg released a 72 page comic about cute bunnies living in a dystopian social credit system; she’d been working on it for months, reducing the updates of Stand Still, Stay Silent in the meantime. In addition to social commentary, Lovely Peopleserved as a vehicle for Sundberg to declare her recently-accepted Christian faith (one that appears to be on the literalist/traditionalist end of the spectrum), which she mentioned in text matter accompanying the comic. The comic itself is gorgeous, the idea of government and commerce collaborating to coerce the population is appropriately chilling, but I found both the story and the accompanying text to present a perspective that Christians are uniquely oppressed that is unconvincing.

Disclaimer #1: I am about as nontheist as you can get, having been brought up a Methodist and been a believer until my late teens/early twenties, when I started sliding from a personal faith to a belief that Christianity can be a metaphorical model without being literally true, to being implausible, to being no more convincing than any other faith or spiritual system, to being entirely without a belief in more than can be measured and observed. My declaration of belief starts with the speed of light in a vacuum, and the closest thing I have to a spiritual belief is I’m convinced that Shannon’s Figure 1 can be used to make my interactions with others better.

Disclaimer #2: Despite the fact that Sundberg has a belief system that is completely alien to my understanding of the universe, this doesn’t make us enemies. I use the term nontheist instead of atheist is because there are so many self-declared atheists that use that label as an excuse to be godsdamned¹ assholes to people that have faith. Any faith, but a lot of them seem to hold particular disdain for Islam². Thomas Jefferson is coming into a much-overdue reappraisal, but I will always respect his greatest work, the Virginia Statute For Religious Freedom, in defense of which he said It does me no injury for my neighbor to say there are twenty gods or no god. It neither picks my pocket, nor breaks my leg. So long as my nontheism doesn’t seek to punish Sundberg’s belief, nor her beliefs seek to punish my lack of belief, we’re good.

But she still felt compelled to write this yesterday:

Today’s comment section is closed since I know many people will be upset about the comic. I left it open yesterday because I wanted to let you vent negative feelings for a bit, but in order to let those who just want to read SSSS in peace do so, I’d direct the venting to the fan forum (or wherever else). I heard there’s a place set up to argue there. I’m in no way affiliated with the forum, it’s all fan-operated, and I don’t visit there, so whatever the mods decide to allow is up to them, I don’t mind.

And, from skimming through the comments (that would be on Monday’s update, here), I can’t say that her reaction was wrong. My usual policy of never reading comments appears well borne-out because I find self-pitying bullshit over there about (paraphrasing lightly here) She’s been brainwashed by evil zealots and In a year there won’t be any of the old fandom left because fundamentalists will flock to keep her from hearing reason and Only if we let them. What the crap, people. No. Stop it.

And today, in place of one of my favorite comics since forever, from one of my favorite creator duos, this:

Shaenon: Hey there. Since all the comments on today’s strip were people complaining about how boring and badly-drawn Skin Horse is, I’ve decided to stop drawing it. There’s no point in continuing a project nobody likes. Sorry for wasting your time.

Sorry, [Skin Horse co-writer] Jeff[rey C Wells].

I don’t know Shaenon Garrity well; I’ve been a vocal booster of her work for about as long as this page has been up, but if I recall correctly, we’ve met in person once³ plus occasional contact on Twitter. If her read on the situation is that this was necessary for her well-being, I am not about to gainsay it. But Jesus tapdancing Christ, can we please, as a society, agree that if something isn’t perfectly to our liking, it is okay to not expose ourselves to it and let other people enjoy it? Are we capable of that? Life is hard enough under normal circumstances, much less during the Plague Year, that it makes less than zero sense to spend time sniping (and worse) at people who aren’t hurting anybody, who are just trying to share a little levity and joy for those that happen to like whatever thing they’re making.

I’m heartened that Garrity updated her stance some hours later:

Update: Thanks to everyone for the kind words. I’m talking to Jeff about what to do next.

To be clear, no one was super mean in the comments; there’s just a long history of complaints and nitpicking and “funny” little jabs, and the first few comments on today’s strip were all in that mode. It just feels like people aren’t enjoying the strip, and I don’t want to make something people don’t enjoy.

I’ve long had a hands-off policy about comments on this page (not that there have been many comments for a looong time), but this is fair warning: if anybody shows up here to complain about Garrity’s present or future decision(s), I will fucking nuke you from orbit. You’re in my house, and we are going to treat people who aren’t doing any harm with a baseline of respect and empathy. You want to be the kind of person that would make Mr Rogers or Dolly Parton ashamed to know you, do it on your own time in your own space where I can pretend you don’t exist, or that you’re a better person that you are.

In the meantime, both Sundberg and Garrity have stores and Garrity has a Patreon. Like their work? They could use some support, and given the parasocial world we’re in, the best most of us can do is to buy their stuff.

Spam of the day:

Firefighter Mike Banner recently stumbled on a Japanese ‘red soda’ that actually heats up and melts large amounts of clogged fat…releasing it as energy…

You’re talking about the country that has a specific style of cooking that’s designed to give sumo rikishi more mass. But they needed to invent a soda to counteract that? Sure.

_______________
¹ If you’ll pardon the contradiction.

² Looking at you, Dawkins.

³ On BART, of all places; my wife and I were on vacation, pretty sure it was Free Comic Book Day, and I was only certain it was her because she was with her husband Andrew Farago, who’d sold us the admission tickets at the Cartoon Art Museum the day before. I did some mid-grade fanboying, and she was kind enough to direct us to some good comics shops in Berkeley.

I say that because I thought we were back yesterday and then ha ha nope, we were down again for 10-12 hours, until the small hours of the morning. I’m going to give it another day or so before I believe that we are actually stable. You saw my Twitter, and Jon’s, and you can probably guess what I think of our current hosting provider¹.

But assuming that we’re up long enough for you to read this, there’s a case of somebody absolutely screwing … not even a customer, in this case more of a partner absolutely sideways in the most hypocritical and impunity-rich manner possible.

See, I was going to talk about the latest update at Oh Joy, Sex Toy, where Erika and Matt share their long-awaited take on the Hismith Quadruple Penetration Fucking Machine. One may recall that the last time this particular pan-sexual roto-plooker was mentioned, I thought Matt ‘n’ Erika had actually made it up and went looking. Note where I found it, that’s going to be important in a second.

The reason I wanted to talk about today’s OJST was because right in the middle of the epic of the HQPFM, there are three panels (which I’ve arbitrarily numbered 10, 11, and 12), which culminate in a shocked-looking Erika stating matter-of-factly (in what I imagine was a very small voice) I saw God. I was eating lunch at the time and nearly choked on laughter and also sandwich. As it is, I think there’s still some mustard-covered sprouted-multigrain sandwich bread in my nasopharyngeal space². I went to the sosh-meeds to share my appreciation and sorrow, only to find that Erika and Matt had bigger things on their mind:

WELL.

Amazon just booted us from their affiliate program, which we use to sell *their* sex toys and copies of our books on sexual health, because Oh Joy Sex Toy features explicit images.

They informed us they do not have to pay us any of the money we earned before this.

So all the pre-orders we did for LET’S TALK ABOUT IT (and all of THEIR sex toys that we sold for them) that were placed through our Amazon affiliate link… nothing. The income we generated from those sales, they do not have to pay us. [emphasis mine]

There’s more, but that’s the heart of it. Amazon did not come to dominate nearly every aspect of commerce and technology by playing fair and out-hustling lazy competitors. They did it by viciously undercutting businesses to where they could not possibly make a profit, squeezing contractors, killing their pick-and-pack workers, demanding delivery speed that results vehicular death on the regular, and inviting companies to sell on their platform until they can pirate designs and kick them off. Oh yes, and withholding money that rightfully belongs to other people because the only way to get it back is to have a deeper legal budget than Amazon and literally nobody has a deeper legal budget than Amazon except maybe Disney.

People ask me why I don’t use Amazon, ever, and everything in that last paragraph is why. Amazon doesn’t give a shit about anybody they have contracted business with, they are merely a source of money to be extracted at their leisure. I have an account with them that’s more than 20 years old, and which has purchased exactly nothing since 2019. There are books that I’ve been waiting for Diamond to get to my local comic shop³ for more than a year that could be here tomorrow via Amazon, and I won’t do it. There’s entire series that exist only on comiXology that I desperately want to read, and likewise no. It’s not worth the human damage.

I don’t think it’s been a big thing here, and certainly something I’ve tried to minimize, but there will never be another link to Amazon or an Amazon-owned enterprise here. If there’s a pre-order that a creator wants people to use, or something that’s exclusive to comiXology I will mention it, but you’re going to have to find it yourself. Fuck Amazon in the physical manifestation of its collective corporate ear-hole, and fuck Jeff Bezos in particular. They suck.

PS: Buy Erika and Matt’s books and merch from almost anyplace else but especially your local bookstore. Support their Patreon. And Let’s Talk About It is not only a marvelous book that you should absolutely read because it will make you a better person, it inadvertently led to the creation of a new heirloom in my family.

And seriously — fuck Amazon.

Spam of the day:

The sexual part of a woman’s brain is much more responsive to the signals your body is giving off than it is to anything you say. That’s why it’s absolutely essential that you know how to turn a woman on regardless of what you say.

Save your money, I’ll tell you the secret: have a luxurious, Commander Hadfieldesque moustache.

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¹ Who bought out the previous hosting provider, who were everything you want in a hosting provider: boring. Excitement is definitely not something you want with respect to your web hosting.

² Ow.

³ Huh. Monopolies suck and screw over everybody they interact with, who’d have guessed.

Re: this and this and this. We have access to Fleen back (obvs), but still working out network at home.

Tomorrow, people.

Hopefully.

After all, there are only so many Shut up and take my money and Just hook it to my veins GIFs that can be posted per second before the lasers that make modern communications infrastructure work start to malfunction and murder random passersby.

And if the source of such money/veins declarations were, say, luxuriously packaged, associated with a wildly popular webcomic, and in a limited edition? Well, that’s just a dangerous situation all around. I speak, naturally, of this:

Friends, what better way could there be to drink illicit hooch from that Lackadaisy Speakeasy (or, if you prefer, straight maple syrup) than from custom-made Lackadaisy shot glasses?

After months of careful product design and sourcing, they’re finally on their way!

Iron Circus Comics is producing an animated short for Tracy Butler’s manic masterpiece, Lackadaisy! And as part of one of that project’s stretch goals, we’ve commissioned a limited, one-time run of Lackadaisy-Speakeasy-themed shot glasses! Each one is emblazoned with the Lackadaisy club logo in gold foil, and they come four-to-a-set in a gorgeous, partitioned wooden crate, oh-so-sneakily labeled as Algid brand “embalming fluid” in case the local coppers get nosy.

Only 1,000 of these sets will be made, and they’re designed and manufactured in accordance with American and international food safety standards. Scheduled to hit American shores in late spring or early summer, but available for pre-order now!

That from the email sent to we at Fleen by C Spike Trotman of Iron Circus and I gotta say, that’s a lot of character for a sales pitch email. For those that didn’t get into the minutiae of the Lackadaisy animated short Kickstart last year, getting the shot glasses made was a US$135K stretch goal¹, and they’ve been through design and sourcing for much of the past year.

Personally, the squared-off design makes them look a bit like a whisky glass², and given the fact that a souvenir-type shot glass will typically run you about ten bucks, a set of four with that gorgeous box is more than fair at US$45. Backers got first crack at the glasses on Tuesday, the general announcement went out today, and I wouldn’t be surprised if the pre-orders are largely spoken for by tomorrow³. I’d say that if you have any interest, you want to get in on the offer now.

Spam of the day:

We greet you !!! If you are interested in a full-time job or a part-time job on the Internet, then we can offer you our way of earning money. Now we provide access to our service, which makes it possible to earn from 20 to 30 thousand rubles a month.

I don’t know if I’m more impressed that you’re trying to entice me with the equivalent of US$268 to US$408 for a month’s full-time work, or the fact that you sent your Russian-language spam in actual Comic Sans. Who knew that the evil transcended the Latin alphabet?

_______________
¹ The project had a base goal of US$85K, and ultimately raised US$330K.

² And in the hands of a cat-sized person, it’s a super-generous pour, and solid enough to do damage in a bar brawl.

³ Although given the fact that this is going to go like hotcakes, a smart person — and Spike is very smart — would be wise to lay in 500 or so extra glasses, to be sold individually for the next forever without the limited edition trappings.

I’ve spent too much of today arguing with my cable company (punctuated by a network glitch about ten minutes ago that has my computer convinced that there is no internet connectivity despite the fact I am typing these words to you), which is actually atypical for me. They’ve been very good as a cable company, but for the past coupla days they’ve been absolute shit as an internet company.

One good dude in the right department (which took me far too long to get to, after multiple false starts), though, so I’m presently awaiting a call back from retention about fixing my problem rather than telling them to get their crap unattached from my house and never darken my doorstep again. Hear that, Cable Company? You get my money because Feraz treated me like a human.

But there are many things on Long Island apart from the historical origin point of my cable/internet provider, some of them good. There’s … oh, the Unprintable Satanist Ritual Killing², that’s good. Jon Rosenberg is from there originally, too. And for our purposes today, the hamlet¹ of Syosset and the library therein.

They’re going to be having an online confab of cartoonists tomorrow evening, 7:30pm EDT, via Zoom. The event goes by the name of Celebrity Drawful, and features Danielle Corsetto, Michelle Ngyuen, Jey Odin, and Shivana Sookdeo. Audience members get to judge which artist does the best job of interpreting ridiculous prompts, and it should be fun for all.

Spam of the day:

We are a marketing provider of the American Bar Association Blueprint. We are offering Law Firms a free no obligation website evaluation.

My dudes, what made you possibly think this is a law firm? I am but one useless man and therefore a disgrace.

_______________
¹ This is an actual municipality type in New York state.

² Unprintable because when the news folks went out to the alleged Satanic ritual killing ground, they found a large rock spraypainted with the words SATIN LIVES. Even the depths of Satanic panic, people couldn’t wrap their brains around kids being so misinformed about their alleged Prince Of All Flesh. Hail Satin.