Amazing Paul Southworth fact #1: He has the ability to warp time and space. The ad for his first Ugly Hill collection, Eyes of Liquid Rage, appeared on his website on January 26th. The last comic to actually appear in the book is this one, which is from last Friday. Spooky.

Amazing Paul Southworth fact #2: He is the only person in history to spell my name correctly in public on the first go. Check it out. No? Didn’t see it? How about now? That, my friends, is attention to detail. The same sort of detail that Southworth brings to EOLR, which focuses on poor, misunderstood Hastings Kilgore, a monster in a world of monsters, a fragile man who’s been beset unfairly by life. Oh sure, on first glance, it appears that Hastings was intentionally created to be the biggest dick this side of Master Shake, but he’s really a hurt, childlike, delicate little sparrow.

Nah, he’s a jerk. Controlling, manipulative, judgemental, and prone to frothing rages, Hastings hates you and everything you stand for. And the thing is, you forget that he and everyone else in Ugly Hill is an actual monster after a while … he just becomes that tremendous workaholic ass that we all know. The world of Ugly Hill, Maulington, and Cornea Falls is a living, organic place, maybe a the outer burbs of Monstropolis; it’s where people live (according to the map in the front of the book, the corner of Prehensile and Vicious looks nice), love, work, and work some more, and occasionally get demoted for such minor transgressions as almost eating a guy. And with that total immersion comes an absurd sense of humor that seeks to reveal life’s essential truths.

That one strip moves EOLR from ordinary workplace humor and shifts it to the realm of genius. Stop salting ham! is the As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly of the new millenium. And if you’re too young to remember that quote, I hate you and everything you stand for.

Ironically, I’d been meaning to link over to Scott Kurtz because I really loved his happy anniversary card to his wife. The art’s more refined than his daily efforts and the sentiment is sweet without being cloying, both befitting such a momentous occasion. Let’s all bask in the good feelings as we lower the steel cage onto the ring….

So! Lotsa drama in the webcomics world today, and there was me on-site with a client that had zero net access. You can read various takes on it from Scott Kurtz and T Campbell, but there’s something Kurtz said that caught my attention hard:

The chapter is entitled “The Seven Horsemen” and it details the seven people who were the big guns in the inception of the webcomics community.

The seven horsemen, according to our “world-reknown webcomics historian” are:

• Scott McCloud
• Pete Abrams
• J.D. Frazier
• Jerry Holkins and Mike Krahaulik
• Scott Kurtz
• and Fred Gallagher.

Chris Crosby is not listed. I don’t think Keenspot is even mentioned. Scott McCloud, on the other hand, has EIGHT pages dedicated to him. Scott’s a friend and I respect and love the man. But was he more influential on the early formations of webcomics than Chris Crosby?

See, we all know that Kurtz has problems with certain … interpretations of what webcomics “mean”; no need to rehash that here. But the careful reader will also recall that when Kurtz gets angry, the target is often Chris Crosby and/or Keenspot. And he’s upset that Crosby and Keenspot don’t have a mention commensurate with their influence on the development of webcomics. Could be that he’s wrong about Campbell’s coverage level; Kurtz has admitted to only having skimmed the book, and it may have been an outdated draft. But the fact that Kurtz in high dudgeon on Crosby’s behalf is significant. It’s to his credit that he is able to acknowledge the contributions of somebody that he’s spent so much time criticizing, and would tend to give one the belief that his assessment of Crosby, et. al., is worth further exploration. Fancy-pants Biblical scholars use a similar technique to work through what may be questionable translations — if a quote is uncomplimentary towards Jesus, it’s considered more likely authentic than if it’s fawning. After all, if you want people to follow your new religion, you’re more likely to puff up the founder a bit. So when Scott Kurtz says something nice about Chris Crosby, it’s probably worth noting carefully. The future will tell if he ever has something nice to say about Campbell, but I’m not offering very good odds:

In my opinion….

This book is nothing more than another self-masturbatory project of the new webcomics cognoscenti crowd. Rather than try to make a name for himself by actually CREATING something, Mr. T. has to piggy-back himself on the webcomics creators out there giving it their all.

I adore the fact that Kurtz speaks his mind — it gives me something to fill the column-inches (Scott, if I get to the nerd prom this year, I owe you a beer), plus, if you’ve ever met Campbell, visualizing him as Mr. T. is sure to provoke cognitive dissonance. But here Kurtz is taking to task not Campbell’s work, he’s chewing on Campbell himself. I’m still trying to decide where this falls on the cheap shot-o-meter, but Campbell doesn’t seem to be too bothered by it. The list of people that he’s collaborated with is about as long as your arm, and he always seems to be juggling a bunch of projects about (one that he ought to find some juggle time for: the front page of Graphic Smash still offers congratulations for last year’s CCA winners … I think eight months may be the statute of limitations on that).

Campbell’s got a fairly large reputation in what is, to be honest, a fairly small community. Is he a non-sleeping mutant, able to be a full contributor on everything he undertakes? Probably not. Does he mooch off the efforts of others while grabbing top billing? Also, probably not. We’ll be able to judge what his solo work is like when his History comes out, and it’ll be up to future generations of webcomics readers to decide the mutant/mooch question. In the meantime, if you’ve worked with T in the past and would like to share your impressions of the experience, feel free to add comments down below or use the contact link.

Now, for a fun game the whole family can play: Campbell has claimed, speak his name and he appears. So the time-to-T-appearance clock starts … now!

Dave Kellett is a guy that lends himself to musical analogies. For example, given that his strip Sheldon is about a boy genius/software billionaire, there are Bill Gates jokes. Every Bill Gates joke in the known universe has been done approximately 2.54 separate times in User Friendly. This might lead one to suspect that Sheldon and UF are similar, and they are in the same way that Protection by Ben Folds is similar to Joe Jackson’s entire early-’80s catalog: same tempo, same chord structure, but somehow, Ben doesn’t suck. In a format (4-panel newspaper-style strip) with a setup (boy billionaire, eccentric grandfather, evil waterfowl) and a medium (syndicated strip forced to be family friendly) that fairly screams with opportunities to suck, Kellett does the exact opposite. You can observe this opposite-of-suck first hand in the first Sheldon collection, Pure Ducky Goodness.

That being said, there are two disclaimers that will have to be kept in mind for the rest of this review. Firstly, since Kellett has a (web-only) deal with United Features Syndicate, the public archives are restricted to the last 30 days and protected by ferocious attack lawyers. Thus, the links that would ordinarily be used in this review to illustrate particular points are not to be found. Perversely, this may work in Kellett’s favor, as you’ll have to buy the book to figure out what I’m talking about when I say that the first strip on page 22 has a great sense of pacing.

Secondly, you need to know that Dave Kellett is seriously in love with me. Alas, his love is cheaply obtained … he knows what I’m talking about. To Dave’s lovely wife Gloria, I’m sorry you have to find out this way, truly I am. With that unpleasantness out of the way, onwards to the review.

It’s obvious from the content of PDG that Kellett has been cartooning his whole life; he likely fell asleep in his tender years with especially good Bloom County strips playing across his eyelids as he drifted off. Remember that one where Opus wound up in a college Republican protest against affirmative action and the students started freaking out on stale beer? Cue the big frat guy with the bucket on his head to start hopping around the background as he shouted I’M A FROG!! Those little Breathedian bits of background absurdity that don’t really have anything to do with the story or the gag, they just set the scene? They’re all over the place in Kellett’s work. Let us count the ways:

• Utterly random pop-culture gag from The Last Of The Mohicans? Check. (page 36)
• Vulcans with jazz hands and Klingons with sparkly codpieces? Check. (page 40)
• Recollection of how every kid has a private hiearchy of quality with respect to Halloween candy? Check. (page 44, despite a rather rude attitude towards SweeTARTS; geez, it’s not like they’re Necco wafers)
• Total appreciation for the cruelty of children and waterfowl? Check. (page 49)
• Ability to channel Calvinball? Check. (page 71)
• Dangerously deranged grandparent instead of the treacly version normally found on the comics page? Check. (page 102)
• Monkey on his back in the form of the food of the gods, Thin Mints? Check. (page 131)

Of interest is the fact that pretty much none of this requires a slavish adherence to the premise of the strip; it’s all just funny whether Sheldon has his billions or not. Add it all together, and you’ve got some seriously good stuff. And don’t take his ability to mock nerdery at face value … he may act all cool around the chicks, but those Klingon warship interiors (page 69) look pretty authentic. So go grab a copy of Pure Ducky Goodness, and if you run into Alyson Hannigan (of course I’m mentioning her again, and I will continue to do so until the inevitable restraining order), be sure to kneel in thanks to Dave Kellett.

The thing about Kristofer Straub is, he knows how to cut through the crap. Puff yourself up with pretension, and he provides the pin. Create a genre that’s rife with cliches, he subverts them. He understands human nature, and just what we’ll do for decent dental coverage. And he knows that sci-fi is how you can talk about things that piss you off right now, without losing the funny.

And he brings plenty of the funny with his first collection of Starslip Crisis, A Terrifying Breach of Protocol. Covering about five months and a half-dozen storylines, it sets the stage for the strip and leaves lots of doors open for later visits. His clean, open character style presents well at almost any monitor resolution, but it especially looks good in the larger size that the book permits; given about 30% more space to stretch, the art is even easier on the eyes than online. Characters are boldly designed, contrast between foreground and background is nice and high, and there’s never a confusing panel or word balloon layout, no matter how busy the page. Additionally, it’s great that the overarching trope of Starslip Crisis is art, since Straub is a master at mimicking styles; the man is the webcomics equivalent of that serious art student you see in the Louvre, doing reproductions of the Great Masters. Not to mention the little extras that you get add when publishing a book; the excerpt from the Starslip drive instruction manual is brilliant.

The book itself is well put-together, something I’ve come to expect from Lulu; there are other small presses out there that deal with webcomics that have sold me multiple titles that fell apart on the first read, but ATBOP feels solidly bound and not likely to crap out on me. This page has spoken before on the need webcomics creators have for reputable vendors that will allow merchandise channels to stay open, and it looks like Lulu may fill one of those needs.

To sum: good strip, good art, good basis for future stories, good quality print. In fact, the only reason to not completely love this book is that there’s a nagging fear in the back of my mind that Straub may be annoyed that we’re encroaching on his turf. It’s a terrifying thought, ’cause he’s got that killer shovel, man.

So, the innaugural New York Comic-con has come and gone; logistical problems aside (too many people, too little space, all the high-traffic booths together), it was apparently a success for the webcomickers in attendance. Both Bryant Paul Johnson and Phil Kahn came up to introduce themselves, the Blank Label guys are all super-nice, and our illustrious publisher bought me beer. A success by any measure! A few wee items to tide you over:

First, on behalf of the BLC crew, a piece of advice for Reed Exhibitions: you screwed up bad by rescheduling their panel. Funny, engaging guys were not able to participate, and it was to the detriment of your show. When the next NYCCC comes up, stick by the schedule you promise. Second, a piece of advice for all webcomics fanboys and fangirls out there: the secret to getting creators to like you is to bring them something they want; bribery works! Third, there will be reviews running this week of books I picked up, and some follow-on interviews in the coming weeks.

Other impressions:

• If he ever decides to give up webomics, Steve Troop has a future in both puppeteering and puppetmaking
• Brad Guigar and Paul Southworth? Separated at birth
• Dave Kellett is funny in a way that a safe-for-six-year-olds newspaper-style audience will never appreciate
• Kris Straub has the ability to kill furries with his mind, for which he deserves your undying thanks
• These three ladies had the booth next to the CBLDF; if you’re one of those guys that gave us money or bought a membership just to have clear sightlines, thank you

News: Fleen will shortly have a new contributor! Due to overwhelming response regardaring This Week In Webcomics Boning, we have obtained the services of an insider. Join us on a trip inside the seamy underbelly of webcomics: the booze, the drugs, the parties, the fast cars and faster women … each Thursday, all this and more will fall under the scrutiny of our very own Tuesday Crimson. Naturally, we will be protecting Ms Crimson’s identity closely, but trust us: she’s got the dirt.

By the time you read this, elements of Dumbrella (including this guy and this guy) and Blank Label Comics (with the scintillating Paul Southworth, sinister Kristofer Straub, kid-friendly Dave Kellet, tenacious Steve Troop, and gregarious Brad Guigar) will be doing final setup at the Jacob Javits Conference Center for the innaugural New York City Comic-Con (not to be confused with the nerd prom of similar name).

Fleen will also be semi-representing, with one of us (me) doing shifts at the CBLDF booth on Saturday. On Sunday, don’t forget to check out the panel titled The Future of Comics: What Works, What Doesn’t, and Where It’s Going…Online, featuring the abovementioned Blank Labellers, Mr Jon Rosenberg of Goats, and Heewoon Chung of Netcomics; room 1E03, 1:00 pm. Drop by and feel free to poke any of them with a wooden spoon.

There will be webcomickers boozing after (and possibly during) the show on several days. Secrets will be pried from the dark recesses of their brains. Interviews, book reviews, and compromising photos will be making their way here over the following weeks.

Plus! For those of you in Western Massachussets, there’s Llamacon at Simon’s Rock College of Bard. Check out the very sexy R Stevens, Randy Milholland, and Jeph Jacques while dodging rampaging herds of catgirls.

Lots of strips have archives that stretch back into infinity — backstory, characters, plots, and plenty more. But like Antoine de Saint-Exupéry said once, Perfection is achieved not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away. Thus, Quill. Twelve panels, three characters (four if you count the cat), fourteen words, one complete story complete with classic slapstick gag. Even the art has been reduced down to the absolute minimal line necessary to convey shape and emotion.

The creator, Michael Maihack, has other strips on his site and they’re good, too. Seed is a beautifully-illustrated adventure tale; Cow and Buffalo is funny, funny, funny. But Quill? It’s like Picasso’s peace dove: nothing left to take away.

This thread over at Websnark is in danger of turning into This Week in Webcomics Boning. You have been warned.

You don’t know George Dunning’s name, but you know his work; one piece of it, at least.

If you read this page with regularity, you do know John Allison’s name and his work; otherwise, we can’t be friends. Sorry. John’s clearly got a love for the lads from Liverpool, even including in his strip a restrained reference or two to the visuals of Mr Dunning.

But today? Full bore homage, complete with lyrics. Try not to hum along with Shelley if you like, but it’s tough. For all the delicious weirdness that has become the hallmark of SGR, it’s not easy topping your best efforts day after day. Says Mr Allison:

After shipping hundreds of items myself in the last couple of weeks, I was spent last week and didn’t really want to make comics at all. Out of desperation came this week’s story, 5 days that I’m pretty sure are my favourites of the whole run.

All webcomics creators take note: getting desperate leads directly to pure, unadulterated whimsey. Just thing thing for an overcast Wednesday morning.

Each day, I figure that the whole mess will have finally burned itself out. That everybody who would have been outraged already has been, that everybody who would have fanned the flames has banked the embers. But for every group trying to find middle ground, each day brings news of another corner of the world that’s expressing violence over cartoons. Rioting over art may be nothing new, but this situation seems to have no natural limit. The death toll must be into the hundreds by now.

Some say the eruptions started as a cynical ploy by governments desperate to distract from bad news. Others want to paint it as a clash of civilizations, or a noble struggle in defense of cherished ideals. Meanwhile, nearly everybody is presuming that what sounds reasonable in their own heads must be universally thought of as just peachy. Need an example? I like this cartoon; to me, it speaks well of Islam. Mohammad could be anybody because anybody can be Muslim, and all believers are equal before Allah. To my eye, it doesn’t even necessarily depict the person of the Prophet; the turbans are maybe unnecessary, and I don’t know what’s up with that guy on the right, but it doesn’t seem insulting to me. Maybe that only makes sense inside my mind.

Talking heads, theorists, and Sunday-morning policy showboaters have all had their say, but what about somebody who straddles the line between Muslim and cartoonist? Mohammad “Hawk” Haque knows what it’s like to be faithful to Allah, while living in a culture that doesn’t always understand (or care to understand) his beliefs. Hawk also knows that a good way to diminish tension (and to educate) is to laugh at yourself.

So I had some questions about his take on this whole situation, and he was gracious enough to answer. Before we get started, try to keep in mind that there is no single doctrine of Islam, and Hawk’s not being asked about anybody’s belief but his own. In the interests of full disclosure, there are links to others of the Danish cartoons; they are not here to provide insult or offense, but only so that our readers know what we’re talking about.
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