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100% Pure Beef

First of all, Jephy McJacquespants got snippy with us the other day — mocking, even — and so we’re not going to give him the satisfaction of a full writeup of Dr McNinja, no matter how much he pimps it. We’re just going to quietly enjoy it ourselves.

Secondly, Achewood appears to have settled once and for all who the cooler character is: Roast Beef or Ray. Sure, the focus these days shifts between them about equally (probably favoring Ray), and they’re both cats of high comedic accomplishment; they straight-up think the deep thoughts like, if an atom bomb goes off, you should check Yahoo News. And plus I have been wanting to drink beer. Truly, lessons for life.

But what tips things permanently in favor of Beef is his reaction today when he realized that Ray comes from a noble lineage:

Serious dude in the 1973 Fight your dad pioneered some of the rawest moves in modern brawling ! He was like the Thomas Edison of handing a dude his ass !

First off: Beef used punctuation. He hardly ever does that, generally only when his is truly delighted and at his most polite; you gotta get some truly deep-down Beef emotions for punctuation to appear.

Secondly, today saw the birth of what history will surely record as the Very Finest Roast Beefism Ever: the Thomas Edison of handing a dude his ass. I predict generic form of x is like the Thomas Edison of y will be the next nerd-culture meme, even displacing the venerable Step 3: Profit! and Needs more cowbell. But what did you expect? Chris Onstad is like the Thomas Edison of amazing dialogue.

look okay, maybe if you hadn’t said that it would be the next cool nerd thing

but now not even nerds will use a line that you endorsed before they got a chance to try it out

that’s just how it works

I most certainly will be endorsing this message. It is like the Thomas Edison of geek things to say.

Ray is hella cooler than Roast Beef, because Beef wrote ‘Java’ on the moon. Java is the Hermann Goering of programming languages!

And can we turn this into a Thomas Edison/Nikola Tesla flame war somehow

They are always so much fun dogg

I think that “scientists are *still* figuring it out!” and “NO ONE said it could be done!” will also be very meme-able demi-phrases. The man knows how to make dialouge sing like the angels.

I would like to point out that Ryan North found Dr McNinja before Jeph found Dr McNinja. Ryan North is the Thomas Edison of finding things on the internet.

Guys, don’t hold out against Dr. McNinja on my account or on the account of other tall dudes with comics! It is an excellent comic and holy I can’t say enough good things.

I would heartily agree with the thomas edison of finding things on the internet about doctors who are also ninjas.

[…] There’s something about Jeph Jacques that makes you want to be in a fake internet fight with him. Sure, we at Fleen decided to spite him by not reviewing Dr McNinja, but you know what? You’re not the boss of me, Jeph Jacques! At best, you are the Associate District Manager of me, which is totally not the same thing! All is forgiven, though, and Dr McNinja will seen on these pages soon. […]

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