I Come To Praise A Softer World, Not To Bury It
Because it’s not a person, there’s no body to bury … and if it were, it’d be the type of person to claw its way out of the grave and snack on the mourners at the funeral for maximum surprise. Joey and Emily are just spontaneous like that.
So here we stand: after one thousand two hundred and forty-three perfect little pillows of hope/despair, melancholy/sanguinity, sexiness/moresexiness, Emily Horne and Joey Comeau leave behind the project that has brought them some measure of internet fame, some measure of internet wealth¹, and critical adoration. Tomorrow’s going to be a less weird place, knowing that they aren’t conspiring together to put exactly the right words and photos together for maximum discomfort, disturbance, and serenity².
Instead, tomorrow they’ll be conspiring together to come up with exactly the right mix of comics for their retrospective collection, Anatomy of Melancholy, the Kickstarter for which will be open for another three hours or so (as I write this). At present, the campaign sits at a hair over US$230,000 which is a good 25 grand higher than the FFFmk2 predicted; it appears that they never added a stretch goal that amounted to We get to choose the good ramen for once, which personally I would have loved to have seen. It’s never good when a Kickstart fails to meet its obligations to backers, but if ever two people were perfectly suited to take a quarter-mil (minus fees) on the lam and never be heard from again, I’d say it’s Joey and Emily. It would be perfect.
But alas, everybody is gonna get exactly what they paid for, and Horne & Comeau will hopefully make a modest profit, but never enough to make up for the dozen years of toil and privation. Thanks for sharing what was inside you, I’m sincerely sorry it didn’t make you rich and famous, and remember — when faking your own death to make off with the money, the secret is to cut all ties with friends and family³. Just sayin’.
Spam of the day:
Bosley Special Anniversary Offer
Seriously, hair replacement? I need hair replacement less than I need to drop 26 pounds for bikini season. The only spam I’ve gotten that’s more wrong-headed was the one with the return address Racy Ukrainian Girls and the subject line Russian Girls are Pursuing Western Bachelors, Communicate Free Today Only. Russians and Urkainians are not the same, idiots!
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¹ That is, minimal, but neither of them starved to death or died of exposure.
² Except for the fact that they hit a stretch goal and will do five comics randomly over the next year.
³ I know Ryan says he can keep your secret, but he’ll slip up. Safer to just disappear.
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