Baby’s Got a Spell on Me, I Don’t Mind, I Don’t Mind
This is the first post from Contestant #5
There is clearly nothing cooler than a doctor who is also a ninja. That is why Dr. McNinja has to be one of the coolest comics ever. Not only does he save the world from nasty diseases like meningitis, but also from pirates, giant lumberjacks, and even McDonalds. Now he has moved onto raptors. And not just any normal kind of raptor, but apparently tame raptors.
This is, of course, awesome because if anyone has seen Jurassic Park (and who hasn’t??) then they know just how sweet it would be to have a tame raptor. They would be at your mercy, doing tricks for you for T-bone steaks (or ponies), attacking anyone you commanded and ripping them apart, bit by fleshy bit. Plus you could RIDE it. And if you also had MIND POWERS then you could like, maybe control all the raptors, and become Raptiro and kill off all the superheroes, but not Batman or Underdog because who can honestly kill a dog? And Batman would just be enslaved, most likely for sexual purposes. Because everyone, no matter what their sexual orientation secretly wants to have intercourse with Batman.
But I digress. So the current story is about raptors, and who knows what else, since none of us have any idea who it is RIDING the raptors (although if it is someone named Raptiro I will clearly wet myself a little), much less why they are stealing old people’s coupons. The latest update is based on a true story, involving heckling and African American women. Except in real life there was no raptor. And the woman wasn’t so much sitting on a bench as in her jail cell.
While, like me, the most current update seems to steer away from the main point, it is merely one page in a series. Where it will go on Wednesday, we will not know, not until Dr McNinja roundhouse kicks us all in the face with yet another update.
I am willing to bet that it involves a little doggy getting eaten though. Although that is just me. And there is nothing I like more than seeing a froufy dog get his.
Okay, so Mr. (or Ms.) #5 gets some bonus bias points because I like Dr. McNinja, but I was highly entertained by the entry. It’s got a nice light sense of fun and humor, and it seems like it’s naturally flowing excitement from someone who really like what s/he is writing about.
Did I mentioned I was wentertained by it?
By Matt Buchwald on 04.25.06 8:29 am
Hey look, I’m writing on the internet, but in a way that makes it look like I am writing a book report for ‘Reading Rainbow’. Oh, wait, no. I forgot. That wasn’t me.
WAIT!!! — Ninjas who are doctors are cool?!??!
By andre babyn on 04.25.06 11:32 am
Kinda funny. A little trite and certainly overly-linked.
Minus points for ending with “get his”. That doesn’t sit well with me. Would have gotten bonus points if they’d added “comeuppance” at the end, because that is an excellent word.
Still, certainly not the worst of the bunch. Perhaps even in the top half.
By Ahniwa on 04.25.06 12:33 pm
Well, Mr. Babyn, I happen to know that Lavar Burton had ‘relations’ with your mother last night.
I won’t say what kind.
By Concerned on 04.25.06 2:56 pm
Have I done meningitis yet?
I’d critique, but I think I have some bias. Although I will say you might have wanted to pick an image that had more to do with the raptor stuff than the turkey in the last episode. UNLESS that’s a reference to the fat kid in the beginning of Jurassic Park who sees the raptor bones and is all “It looks like a turkey!”
By Chris Hastings on 04.25.06 8:09 pm
OMG YES!! HOW ON EARTH DID YOU GET THAT OBSCURITY????
By contestant #5 on 04.25.06 8:47 pm
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